As you all know, some of you dread, and others look forward to, next week will be the last pumpkin spice sacrament program of the year. This year, due to some complaints from people who don’t like the taste of mint, we will be changing the flavor of sacrament programs in December to be egg nog. Be warned, however, that due to being manufactured in the same facilities as other denominations, some of the sacrament programs may have an alcoholic egg nog flavor. Therefore, we suggest that children and expectant mothers not partake of the sacrament program for the entire month of December. In January, we will return the usual flavor for that month, namely ennui with a hint of sports car–perfect for a mid-life crisis, so start planning now.